


Head in the Clouds

by SeptSapphire



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Dean Winchester, Angel Sam Winchester, Artist Castiel, Human Castiel, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-16
Updated: 2014-04-16
Packaged: 2018-01-19 16:15:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1476028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeptSapphire/pseuds/SeptSapphire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam is an angel of the Lord, sent to watch over a man named Castiel. His brother is just along for the ride. Castiel keeps claiming that he knows them as humans, but that just can't be true. Sam's been an angel since the beginning of time, literally. Right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Head in the Clouds

Humans were odd.

When Sam told Dean this, his brother just laughed and told him, "Embrace the culture. It might help you get that stick out of your ass." He hadn't heard the phrase before, but with Dean's intonation he was able to get the general sentiment.

If you asked him, Dean had been spending far too long around these humans.

Contrarily, Sam hadn't been down on Earth for hundreds of years. He witnessed the first humans, their corruption, and centuries of war and pain, stories and laughter. Recently, though, he'd had other duties to attend to. While they weren't something he understood, even after observing them for so long, he had to admire the human race. They had taken God's great Earth and made creations of their own.

This didn't make him any more excited for the prospect of babysitting a human. Unfortunately, it was his assignment to watch over the human Castiel, a task that he was already predicting to be unpleasant to say the least.

For one, the boy and his family knew nothing of angels, not truly. For another, he did not even know why he was being assigned this task. There seemed to be nothing special about the human, at least not as far as he has been told or had observed.

Regardless, he had orders to follow, and he certainly would not run the risk of disobeying them.

~~~

"Sam Winchester?"

"I do not know how you came upon my name. Though I assure you, angels do not have last names. Who is this Winchester?"

Castiel's face morphed into a scowl. "I will not allow you to possess my friend."

Sam had been expecting resistance, but this just didn't make sense. "You could not have ever met this man. He has been my vessel from a time 2000 years in the past."

"Don't lie to me. Sam Winchester is a friend of mine, and I will not let you harm him. Who are you?"

 _This_ question made sense. This he could answer. "I am Samuel, Angel of the Lord."

"No." Castiel shook his head. "No, you cannot be. Someone must be playing a trick on us. You need to remember who you are, Sam."

"I'm afraid I don't understand."

At that same moment, Sam heard feathers ruffling behind him, and could sense without turning that it was Dean.

"Hey Sammy, meet your pet human yet?"

Before Sam could snap at Dean for leaving his post again, Castiel interrupted, "Dean."

"Hey, how'd he know that? You been telling him stories already? Did I miss your gossipy slumber party?"

"You do not remember me either." It sounded defeated.

Sam chose to elaborate, hoping to speed things up. "He knew my name as well, but... not my name. I believe Castiel thinks he knows us as humans."

"But I do. You were my friends," the man protested. Talking in circles was starting to give Sam a headache.

"We are not who you think we are. Regardless, I am required to tell you that I am here to watch over you. For whatever purpose you may need me for."

~~~

"The first humans were not like this."

Castiel jumped, whirling to face the angel behind him, who was now staring over his shoulder at the paintings up on the wall. Upon closer inspection, it appeared that Castiel did not remember creating these paintings either, even though Sam had watched him do it from Heaven. Perhaps the man had suffered from amnesia, and that was why he was granted a guardian. It wasn't unheard of.

"What?"

"The first humans. They did not value art like this- drawings were functional, not passionate endeavors, for they valued war, honor, and bravery."

"Painting pictures of flowers and landscapes must seem rather childish to you then." Castiel's cheeks were glowing red in embarrassment, but Sam did not know what he was embarrassed about.

"On the contrary, I find them impressive. There's a certain elegance here. They are... enjoyable."

The expression of bitterness looked out of place on the man's face. "You must just be saying that because you are stuck with me. I don't measure up to the great warriors you speak so fondly of."

"It doesn't take an act of war to be considered a hero, Castiel."

Before Castiel could blink, Sam was gone again.

~~~

Sam was rather disappointed with his new task.

When the job had come to him, he had come to see it as something prestigious, but he couldn't help feeling a bit... bored.

He was sure angels weren't supposed to feel boredom.

Castiel's life seemed to move at the pace of a slow crawl, especially to one who was so used to decades passing by in the blink of an eye. Every day was agonizingly slow, routine, and uneventful.

Castiel, of course, begged to differ with that last one. This may have been because the man was still convinced he knew Sam as a human and spent his days trying to prove it.

Sam was still betting on amnesia and delusions, even though none of his supervisors had warned him about anything of the sort.

While Sam spent his time in the background, hidden from human perception on most days, Dean took any chance he could get to follow along. He was constantly talking to Castiel, feeding his thirst for anything human.

When Dean had first adopted the nickname Cas, the man had looked at him with such hope that Sam himself started to believe Castiel's delusions.

But he was an _angel_ , as was his brother, and they had always been that way.

~~~

Castiel was, at the very least, an impressive human. Sam learned this when, at Dean's urging, he started to spend more time in his charge's home.

He knew a great deal of history, things Sam assumed were lost to time. When Sam asked where Castiel learned this he was told time and time again that "I was there, I witnessed it." While these claims were clearly false, his responses, frustratingly, meant Sam never got an answer to his question.

Still, Castiel was a wealth of information, not only about what Sam had witnessed centuries ago but about everyday human things.

He watched in rapt attention as Castiel operated a microwave, citing his knowledge of the device from 'The Internet', whatever book that may have been. Castiel refused to let him read it after the last laptop-related incident.

Sam's charge was especially demonstrative of human emotion. Right now, he was somewhere between what Sam had learned to recognize as 'impatience' and 'enjoyment', the look on his face caused by Sam's in-depth study and thorough trial of all of the buttons on the microwave.

He kept pulling Sam's hand away when he would accidentally try to change the clock or activate the machine without putting anything in it, correcting his mistakes. It was a slow process, but by the end of it Sam was confident he was fully knowledgeable of this new technology.

"Nothing this complicated ever existed in Babylon," he grumbled petulantly, scowl firmly on his face after Castiel's teasing laughter. "You are the one who banned me from 'the internet', you remember."

Castiel's grin only grew. "Perhaps we should move on to the television?"

Sam nodded, following his charge to the couch. Castiel sat down, so Sam followed, perching himself on the opposite side. He watched as Castiel grabbed a slim rectangular box, pressed a button, and a larger box on the wall flared to life.

Sam leaped out of his seat and in front of Castiel, angel blade drawn and held out towards the pictures, noise, motion of the television. "What monster is this?"

Castiel reached out and grabbed his arm, tugging hard but unable to move him. "Sam, calm down. It is not alive."

Sam remained rigid and wary, but after determining that the television was not a threat he returned his sword to his inner jacket and came back to the couch. Since Castiel's hand still grasped his arm, he sat much nearer to his charge this time.

Castiel immediately let go, and Sam felt himself oddly disappointed. He ignored the urge to say anything about it.

"Is this... enjoyable? To humans?"

"The television shares stories. Many humans get invested in these shows."

"...May we watch one?"

Castiel nodded and settled back against the couch, arm brushing with Sam's as he mirrored the action. They stayed close together for multiple episodes, silence only broken by Sam's occasional questions for clarification, until Castiel fell asleep against his side.

~~~

Dean popped by rather frequently when Sam was watching over Castiel. He treated them to movie night, teasing Sam about his lack of "culture" when it came to films.

"Can't believe you've spent so much time on Earth and you haven't watched the classics, man." Dean reached across Sam and grabbed a handful of popcorn from the bowl that was perched on Castiel's lap. Though Sam trusted his closest brother with his own life, he knew he had to be nearest to Castiel at all times. For his job.

"This "Braveheart," what makes it so special?" Sam asked, earning affronted eyes from his brother.

"You're kidding, right?" Dean spluttered around a mouthful of the fluffy white corn, only pausing to swallow when Sam grimaced at the sight. He hadn't quite gotten an appetite for human foods yet, but Dean certainly seemed to love it- a bit too much, if you asked Sam. "The action, the valor, it's practically more awesome than watching the real thing!"

"Humans enjoy watching their kind kill each other?" Sam asked, disturbed by the very idea. Murder was not entertainment.

"Dude, just shut up and watch. You'll understand."

Sam sighed, settling further into to the couch, which happened to nudge his shoulder closer to Castiel's. If he was going to watch a movie about violence and death, he might as well be comfortable.

Not that Castiel's presence gave him more comfort or anything. Dean's gleeful comments were just making him nervous, that was all.

At any rate, Cas seemed to have no objections to the position, so Sam made no effort to lean his vessel away.

Despite his objections, the movie proved to be fairly captivating. It was not, as he had thought, solely about war and death, but rather encompassed loyalty and love in its central themes. 

There was something noble about a fight motivated by a force as pure as love, however much it may have also been motivated by a certain degree of bloodlust.

Cas hadn't seemed to share his and his brothers' enthusiasm for the film; his charge had drifted into sleep halfway through. When the film ended, he was asleep, head tipped onto Sam's shoulder.

"I should take him to his bed," Sam murmured quietly, leaving Dean to turn off the television.

~~~

"What's got your feathers ruffled?"

"I do wish you wouldn't make light of our wings by turning them into _jokes_ , Dean."

Dean grinned, unrepentant. "Never pass up a good joke, Sammy. But seriously man, you've been more uptight than usual."

Sam frowned. He had certainly not been 'uptight' recently. He had been confused, certainly, maybe even distraught, but that was hardly the same thing.

"Sam?" Dean questioned in the tone that meant Sam's silence had provoked the need for a serious discussion.

"It's nothing. I feel foolish."

"Is this about Cas?"

He couldn't hide the twitch in his shoulders. Dean knew him better than any of his other brothers and sisters, but how could he see the problem so easily? Sam must have been worse at hiding it than he thought.

He didn't want to discuss this with Dean. Didn't want to discuss it with anyone, really. But he knew Dean wouldn't let it go. "I've never felt affectionate for a human before. My reactions are troubling. Is it really a good idea for me to grow so close to him, to befriend a human?"

"Well, I wouldn't necessarily stop at friendship..."

"What are you implying?" Sam asked, though he was fairly certain he already knew.

"Hey, it's your life, man. If you want to screw a human, go right ahead."

"Dean!" Sam yelped, face flushing. "I couldn't. It wouldn't be right."

Dean gave him a long, serious look. "You're not saying you don't feel that way about him, though."

He couldn't lie to Dean. He had to admit, he had been feeling less than professional about his relationship with Castiel. But he knew his advisers wouldn't allow it. Sam was supposed to be protecting his charge, not getting involved with him.

"Just think about it, okay? I'm not blind, I can see that you two lovebirds would be happier together, no matter what that asshole Zachariah might say."

" _Dean_ " Sam chided at the crude name, but he couldn't hide the fondness in his voice.

~~~

Relationship troubles weren't the only worries plaguing Sam's mind. As each day on Earth slipped by and nothing remotely dangerous happened, Sam grew more sullen. What had started out as enjoyably easy days had quickly become hard to handle.

He had been sent here to protect Cas, but as far as he could tell the man was perfectly safe, if still not entirely recovered from his potential memory loss. So what was his purpose?

Was this some kind of test? Or worse, was it just a cruel game being played at his expense? Did they know Cas would face no danger and sent Sam here just to laugh at his expense? Was he really so worthless to Heaven's army?

"Sam?"

Sam blinked, refocusing on Cas' face. The man looked like he'd been trying to get his attention for a while. "Sorry."

Cas' face pinched, scrutinizing Sam. "You've been more and more distracted recently. What is it? ...You're not happy here, are you?"

"I'm... no! That's not it at all, not like that, I just... I'm not sure why I'm still here. You are clearly safe, or you were never in harm's way in the first place. I must be rather useless if my superiors haven't mentioned my return to Heaven yet." Sam tried to play it off as uncaring, but his voice came out surprisingly bitter.

"It doesn't take an act of war to be considered a hero."

"What?"

"You told me that."

"...I don't understand."

Castiel's eyes narrowed in annoyance. _I can't even understand my charge now,_ Sam thought. _I'm truly a failure._ How could he have ever felt so prideful when he clearly possessed such faults?

"You said... but you were a hero, Sam. You resisted an archangel and saved humanity."

"I-"

Cas's voice grew in volume. "You and your brother returned Lucifer to his cage on sheer willpower. You saved a world who never showed you any kindness, even if it meant sacrificing yourself, facing torture for eternity. You were a _hero,_ couldn't accept it then and can't accept it now because _you can't remember it!_ " He screamed, the first time Sam had heard the man get this loud, anger flaring in his gaze.

Cas's voice, when it finally broke the silence, was barely a whisper. "I never said it then, but perhaps I should have. You don't have to be part of Heaven's army because you were- _are_ a hero, Sam Winchester."

The room fell back into silence. These were statements Sam just couldn't believe, even if they came from a man he'd learned to trust.

He tried to refute these claims, tried to say anything at all, but before he could Cas moved closer to him and suddenly he couldn't think of anything to say.

Sam's vision blurred, but when it returned the world was the same- he was in the apartment building, his pulse is racing, and Castiel's lips were on his.

Castiel, likely discouraged by his lack of reaction, pulled back. "I'm sorry. It's a gesture of affection. I assumed you felt the same way."

"No, wait-" Sam began, just as Castiel added "I'll just-" and then both of them were interrupted at once.

"For Dad's sake! If I have to watch you morons fumble your way through this any longer I think I'm gonna go insane!"

Sam and Cas whipped their heads to follow the voice, mirroring each other, and both asked at the same time, "Gabriel?"

"Miss me?"

Sam was speechless. On top of the surprise of Castiel's feelings for him rested the shock of discovering that Gabriel was both alive and safe.

Castiel was far from silent. "We thought you were dead! I grieved for you!"

Gabriel gave a flippant scoff, but there was a touch of genuine emotion behind it. "Well, I _was._ It takes a while to bust out of Purgatory. Unfortunately, I got out before you two realized you should just date already. So, I used my newly reanimated self to fix that issue. You should be humbled."

"So my life in Heaven, my memories, this whole universe is all-"

"One big dream, kiddo. You should be waking up in three... two... one..."

"Wait!"

~~~

Sam's eyes flew open and he nearly crashed onto the floor. After situating himself more comfortably on the bed, he was left to remember his so-called dream in silence- that is, until the bed next to him creaked and his brother emerged from a blanket cocoon.

"Dude, I just had the weirdest dream," Dean mumbled.

"We were angels? Cas was human?" Dean nodded, expression wary and mildly creeped out. "It wasn't a dream. It was Gabriel."

"What? Why? Wait, he's alive?"

"Yeah, apparently," Sam mumbled, opting to answer the easier question first. "He wanted Cas and me to..."

"Finally stop crushing on each other like man children and just screw already?"

"Dean!" Sam yelped, face heating up at hearing it mentioned so casually.

Dean just grinned. "Hey, something Gabriel and I can agree on. Maybe there really are miracles. So, did you get together yet?"

"...Yeah." _I think._ But he didn't say that, for fear of prolonging the conversation.

"Good. The moping was getting obnoxious. In both worlds."

Sam glared, ready to collapse back into bed until he heard the rustle of wings. He snapped to attention, blurting out, "Cas, do you remember that too?" before he can stop himself.

"You know what? Breakfast sounds like a good idea right now. I'm just gonna go." Sam and Cas waited in silence as Dean hightailed it out of the room, eager to escape any form of emotional discussion even if it wasn't aimed at him.

~~~

"I remember, Sam." It was the first thing either of them had said since Dean left. "The whole thing. And I know you do, too."

Sam's face flushed. He'd never meant for Cas to find out about his self doubts, let alone his feelings for the guy. Now the angel knew both. "Sorry, I-"

"Sam."

Sam's mouth snapped shut.

"Do you remember everything as well?"

He nodded mutely.

"Then you remember that I was the one to kiss you first." Sam's head snapped up, wide eyes locking on Castiel's. He'd expected the angel to say that his actions had been influenced by Gabriel, that he hadn't really meant...

"And I meant everything I said about you." Cas smiled, a barely-there quirk of the lips, and Sam returned it with another, longer kiss.

Confetti landed in Sam's hair, causing him to break away from Cas with a confused but amused frown.

"Cheers for the happy couple!" Gabriel, alive as promised, was suddenly in their motel room. He had also seen it fit to dump several bags of confetti on their heads. And to snap a very confused looking Dean back into the room with him.

"Gabriel," Cas said. "It is good to see you alive."

"Glad to be back, bucko. And I'm especially glad I get to skip the melodrama between you two. Everything worked out just grand, huh Sam?"

Sam glared, but only halfheartedly. Maybe, even with Gabriel's scheme, things had actually worked out for them after all.


End file.
